Moab 2014!! (Prologue)
The big club trip to Moab is now in the history books, and if you were unable to make it this time around – put it on your bucket list of things to do before your lose the ability to do so. It was WONDERFUL!!!
I’ll attempt to put together a few thoughts on the last most of 2 weeks on the wheeling road and our little band of travelers who shared some trail time together.
Moab is a multi-media experience. The “big-ness” of the country, the beauty of the geologic formations, the physical testing of the wheeling, the emotional impact of pushing yourself past what you thought were your limits – the sheer “being-away-from-it-all” of this no-excuses land if you will allow yourself to experience it on those terms. It is a life-changing, mind-bending alteration of your existence.
It is said that there are 3 truly outstandingly rewarding experiences in life:
1. A good orgasm
2. A good bowel movement
3. Insanely good wheeling
When on the trail in Moab – there are many places where you can experience all 3 of these occurrences – simultaneously…….
But – I get ahead of myself. Follow along with some random thoughts on tales of the trail……
Base Camp
Every good adventure also requires a place from which to happen. The city of Moab surprised me by having almost every moment of the year crammed full of some kind of event or happening that would take up lodging space. I think it was “Gay Adventure Week” (the banners along the main drag gave no clue to what that might have entailed) the week before we showed up, and next week there is the “Punkin’ Chunkin’” contest weekend (which is a little more self explanatory….). What has been key in Tamer trips to Moab in the past has been a communal space from which to live together, review events together, tell tales together, repair rigs together, and in all – share some life together. It is what Tamers have done historically. By the time in advance of the trip this year’s crop of Tamers solidified and committed to go, it was probably a little late to have our choice of accommodations. During the weeks of our trip, we shared it with a big bicyclist event, as well as an artist’s symposium – and short of grabbing a camp ground and camping together in common (which was also considered) much research showed the only lodging as yet available to be “La Casa” – a house offered by the only hostel (that’s “hostel”, not “hostile”) in town – known as “The Lazy Lizard.”
Not that we are unfamiliar with the LL folks. We rented a house from them the last time the Tamers travelled to Moab. The “Watermelon House” not necessarily so named because we found it seedy – but it does kind of get you the drift. The Lazy Lizard seems to be run by an amorphous gaggle of 70’s drop out old hippies whose retirement plan may be to hope their property will, without maintenance or other capital improvement somehow miraculously stay standing and generating income until someone comes along to pay some significant amount of money to develop it into a real hospitality establishment. I certainly saw little evidence to the contrary, as we got to park next to piles of cut down shrubs, rotting banana peels and watermelon rinds and other junk waiting in vain to be taken to the dump.
But this seems mean spirited and is not meant to be. “La Casa” was our home away from home for 10 folks over varying parts of 12 days. The toilets flushed, the hot water continued in relative abundance, the fridge kept our leftovers cold. And – the quirks could (key word “could”) become endearing in the proper frame of mind. Everyone needs a shower that has the shower head strategically located so that you could not only bathe, but of sufficient height to have your bellybutton douched anytime you wanted to freshen up a bit. Kind of like an upper level bidet – which might actually have been named a “mid-det” in its habit of hosing your midsection first. The drain on the other shower was a bit slow, so that you could accomplish both a shower and foot soak, all at the same time! Unless the incubation period of some illness like “lizardola” exceeds 2 weeks, I think everyone exposed to the lodgings came out of it unscathed and stronger for the experience.
In the bedrooms, there was evidence of a mythical creature named “Brenda” – so revealed by an envelope in each of the 5 bedrooms suggesting financial contributions in appreciation of her labors in keeping the joint spotless during our stay. If there even was a “Brenda” anywhere on the grounds, her efforts appeared to be as concealed as she was, as we made regular stops at the office for attainment of our own trash bags and toilet paper, and I became intimately acquainted with the location of the dumpster so that we didn’t have to countenance our own trash a-moldering away in the kitchen. I will say – the trash bags and the TP were always willingly given over without question, and we were happy with that. (“TP? – You don’t need no stinkin’ TP! Heck – in this dry desert air – no need to wipe – you can just let it crust over and then knock it off with a chisel!”) Towels? Now – that is a different story entirely. We apparently had bumped up against our towel allotment early in the week – possibly even before we arrived……
But back to Brenda – I in fact think “BRENDA” may actually have been an acronym, standing for “Benign Requiem of Effacing Negligence Daily Affirmed.” I think it is the underlying credo of the Lazy Lizard, and they reinforced this standard without actually being pushy about it. Needless to say – if she even is an existing being – Brenda did not find financial gain in her minimalist efforts to leave us relatively serviceless…..
But – that is not a quibble. We were not here to tape another episode of “Hotel Impossible.” We were here to go WHEELING IN MOAB, and in that – this place was eminently suitable. The best part of the layout was the big kitchen which contained a big table – and it was at this table where myriads of pictures and videos were daily downloaded, shared and reviewed.
The cast of characters:
John and Gina
Curt, Wendy, Emily, Kaylee
Anthony and Tiffany
Bruce and Debbie
Moose and Mary
(Thus endeth the prologue. Next installment of this manifesto – “The Trails………”)